


Now or Never

by upsteadheart



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-19 08:00:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29623116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/upsteadheart/pseuds/upsteadheart
Summary: A re-write of Chicago PD 7x10. What would have happened in my version if things had been more dire than the canon version showed us and some confessions were forced out.
Relationships: Jay Halstead & Hailey Upton, Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton
Kudos: 51





	Now or Never

Seven hours. That was a normal time for a surgery to last right? Docs making sure they got everything right, didn’t do anything half-assed, and took their time with removing the bullet and repairing the wound to the best of their abilities...

It felt like seven years if she was honest. Hailey couldn’t remember not sitting cross-legged in the waiting room chair.

Everybody else had long since left the hospital. Either back to work or home for the night. But after finding her partner like she had, watching him cling to life in that ambo and be wheeled in here straight into emergency surgery, Hailey didn’t trust her shaking legs or hands to get herself home in one piece.

So, she stayed. Said about a dozen different Hail Marys’, and prayed it was enough to save Jay’s life.

What felt like eons later, Will came back into the waiting room and walked over to where Hailey sat on her own in the deserted area.

“Hailey.” He breathed, making the blonde’s head immediately snap up to look at him. Will squatted down in front of her, leveling himself with her so that he wasn’t looking down at her.

The look in his eye took her heartbeat away and made breathing feel nearly impossible. “It doesn’t look good, Hailey.” Will told her, crushing her heart like boulder, her lip quivering as her stomach fell to her feet.

“Will…” She plead. A sigh escaped the doctor, trying to keep his own composure as his brother fought for his life.

He looked back at up at her, his own words like venom in his mouth. “He’s lost a lot of blood, Hailey. Dr. Marcel was able to get the bullet out without any fragments being left behind, and stitch it up cleanly.

But, Jay slipped into a coma during surgery.” Hailey’s breath hitched. “He’s hangin’ on by a thin thread, and things are getting weaker by the minute. Think it’s time to get yourself ready, Hailey.” Will warned.

Her head snapped up at that, her eyes pleading. “Prepare yourself that he may not make it through the night.” Will’s voice cracked, thinking about losing his brother.

Then in an instant, Hailey fell apart. Will caught her and held her up like he knew his little brother would if he was here.

“Can I – can I see – him – please?” Hailey begged him, her words incoherent. “Hailey…” Will warned.

“If I’m never gonna see him – again… I’d like to see the man I love one more time – before he’s gone.” She told her partner’s brother, making the redhead’s eyes go wide.

“The man you love?” He questioned. Hailey sniffled a couple of times, swiping under her eyes, and failing to gain her composure her back.

“I may suck… at feelings… I may keep myself… closed off… all the time… doesn’t mean I don’t… feel… anything…” Will dropped his hand to her shoulder, trying to get her to calm down.

She looked back up at him, her eyes pleading with everything they’ve got. “Common.” Will led her up out of the chair and upstairs to the recovery wing.

\--

They stopped outside the door before Will let her in. “There’s an intercom on the wall above the sink. Hit the red button to call if you need anything.” Hailey simply nodded her head.

Will then opened the door and let her inside. The second her eyes fell on Jay, his body laying perfectly still in the massive hospital bed, more monitors than she could count hooked up to him… she nearly broke all over again.

Hailey’s wobbly legs got her over to the chair at his bedside. She dropped down to it, just watching him for a second.

Then another sob came up her throat, her body convulsing with the ones she’d yet to release. Hailey leaned forward, her nimble fingers running through his short brown hair.

“I’m so sorry, Jay…” She cried. “I should’ve – been there. Should’ve – pushed harder and had your back. Kept you safe.” Hailey told him unconscious form.

“Will says you can hear me. Even if you don’t – react.” She went on. “Told me to… Prepare myself… for the worse. Please don’t make me have to do this.” Hailey begged him, as tears rolled down her cheeks, the hot salt burning at her eyes.

“Please do not make me live in a world where you’re gone. You’re not gone yet. You can still come back. You love life, Jay, and being alive. Driving the truck up the mountain, stuffing ourselves to the rim with deep dish from Bartoli’s, weekend movie marathons and making fun of cheesy 80’s romance movie lines…” Hailey rambled on desperately.

She didn’t know what else to do with herself anymore. So desperate to hold onto her partner, and petrified of losing him. “I swear to god, Jay, I will do anything, I promise. I’ll stop touching the radio in the truck, I’ll let you pick where we have lunch, I’ll even let you be the one to kick in the door once in a while.” She rolled her eyes, managing to laugh even a little.

“I don’t wanna lose you, Jay. I don’t wanna lose you…” Hailey went on.

“Jay…” She dropped, her hand on his cold, pale cheek. This was it. Now or never. “I love you, Jay Halstead… I love you so much.” Her head fell to his shoulder, letting herself go, and the fear of losing him wash over her. Crying incessantly until she knocked herself out.

\--

Beep… Beep… Beep… “Hailey?” She heard. “Hailey?” It came again. “Hailey.” A third time, more insistent this time.

Her eyes blinked open and closed a few times. Her lids heavy and her eyes absolutely burning from crying her eyes out last night.

Will’s face came into view, as she rubbed her eyes, trying to come to fully. “Will?” She dropped.

“Hey. Look who’s awake.” He smiled, stepping aside to let her eyes fall on her partner. His hazel eyes now open faintly, landing on her baby blue orbs.

“Hails…” His weak voice came. “Jay!” She cried, her arms around his neck, clinging to him like the last dying breath of fresh air.

“Easy, Hailey.” Will warned. His brother had just had major surgery, and his body was in quite the fragile state right now.

“It’s okay, Will… I’m fine…” Jay assured his brother as convincingly as his weak voice would allow, holding his best girl close.

Jay’s hand fell to the back of his partner’s head, his fingers tangling in her blonde hair. “I’m okay… Hails.” He attempted to assure her, his speech down to barely a whisper.

“Don’t you ever do that to me ever again.” She cried against his good shoulder, positively stuck to his body.

Jay leaned his forehead against hers, feeling her heart race against his chest. “Heard your confession… while I was under.” He brought up.

Hailey froze momentarily at that. “If you’re about to make light of it, I’m gonna punch you so hard in that bullet wound.” She threatened, making him laugh as much as he could manage to.

He shook his head against her. “No. Never. I love you too… Hailey Upton. More than anything – in the world.” Jay got out. 

Hailey turned her head to look up at him, nothing but pure love and fear to lose the most important man in her life swimming in her eyes.

She dropped her hand to his, their fingers twined together. Jay pressed a kiss against her forehead, his other thumb coming up to wipe the stray tears from under her eyes.

Will poked his head back into the room, making Jay look up at his brother. “Called Voight to let him know you’re awake. Any time frame in specific when you’re ready for the rest of the team to come around?” The doc asked Jay.

Jay looked down at Hailey, finally starting to relax in his arms. “Gimme just a day, man. I just need to rest up… Hold my girl for a little bit.” He felt Hailey smile into his neck at that.

Will felt his insides light up, finally seeing his brother get a second chance at love and live to see it. “Sure thing, man.” He nodded at his brother, before stepping back out of the room.

With their heads pressed together, both of them as comfortable as can be. Both Hailey and Jay’s eyes slipped shut, letting a slumber take them over.


End file.
